Happy Hamilton's Examining Board for Trainee Customer Service Professionals on The Modern Rail Network is proud to present the following test paper in order that potential staff can test their reactions to certain incidents.
Answers available on request; for chrissakes don't take it too seriously, and if anyone else (especially Robert Volland or Bob Waller <g>) wishes to add situations feel free... :-)
Oh, yes, and answers that say "Well, I think you should do x even though it's not one of the options" don't count: you can only work with the equipment you have, not that which you'd want. I will however allow you to use your initiative. Remember though that you have no phone, no refreshment trolley, no "freebie" vouchers on these trains. All you have of any use is a timetable and complaints forms.
Q1: You are working a local train on a service which has a half hourly frequency. You are running 7 (seven) minutes late. It is a nice day, dry, sunny and warm. You arrive at a station and a solitary passenger boards, so you walk down the train to check her ticket. As you approach she starts complaining loudly and abusively about the train being late.
1a) Do you:-
1a1) Apologise profusely, offer to obtain a complaints form
and forget about the ticket;
1a2) Apologise, but insist on seeing her ticket
anyway;
1a3) Respond in the same sort of language she is using.
1b) What chance, in your experience, is there that the passenger:-
1b1) Is looking for trouble?
1b2) Is making a genuine complaint but is
inarticulate?
1b3) Is trying to frighten you off as she does not wish to pay
for her journey?
Q2: You are working an early evening train from a major town to a nearby city. You have a 3 coach unit and 12 passengers. You also have a colleague travelling who is working the train so you can check tickets. 3 passengers are in the rear coach; the remaining 9 are in the middle. Entering the middle coach you note that the toilet is still locked out of use from the previous day. You check two passengers as near the toilet; the remaining 7 are in the centre of the coach.
In the first bay there are 2 yobboes/rastas/junkies/skinheads (insert personal bête noire). They look nasty, and have copious amounts of alcohol with them. Two bays ahead are 5 businessmen who have stopped off for a 'quick one' before going home. You suspect, correctly, that there will be trouble.
2a) Which group will cause trouble?
2b) What will happen when the troublemakers start on you?
Q3: You are working an interurban train, with a goodly load of passengers aboard. You are stopped at an isolated signalbox and told that a train ahead has hit a herd of cows and may have derailed in the block section (i.e. between the two signal box areas). The crew are in shock and are not certain of their actual location so a track gang are walking the line to find out exactly where they are. You will then go and rescue the stranded passengers.
In the meantime you keep in contact with control who come up with various plans to deal with your passengers. As always happens, things don't go to plan and most of these ideas have to be abandoned after a while.
3a) Do you:-
3a1) Tell your passengers nothing apart from "We will be delayed"
until a confirmed plan is notified?
3a2) Tell your passengers everything you are told on the principle of "At
least they'll be as confused as I am"?
3a3) Tell your passengers certain sanitised information to string them
along?
3b) Explain your reasons.
Q4: You are working in adverse weather conditions: it has been snowing, it's extremely windy and trees are down all over the place. On local radio and tv the emergency services are appealing for people to stay at home unless absotively, posilutely essential as they are overstretched and cannot cope with any more incidents.
You have aboard 1 drunk who you recognise as a freelance reporter who likes causing trouble, 4 middle aged women and a couple of students.
You come grinding to a halt short of a large dead oak tree which is blocking the line. You have one small saw. The track gang will not be along for at least an hour as they are up to their eyes in it.
The drunk gets stroppy at first but when you show him the saw and say you're going out there to have a go at the tree gets all sentimental and promises to lionise you in the local rag. The students give up and set off back down the track to the nearest station - this is reasonably safe as you are the only train moving - and the women start saying "But we'll miss the sales, we've only come in to do some shopping at C&A, there's some lovely skirts on offer" etc, etc.
Do you:-
4a) Point out that shopping for clothes hardly constitutes an essential
journey;
4b) Say "Haven't you got the sense you were born with? The bloody
police are pleading with people to stay at home and all you're worried about is
getting to the shops when the telly's showing pictures of the city closed 'cos
no-one other than me and my driver are at work?";
4c) Walk away, go to the tree, scream a few times and start crying in
despair?
Q5: You are assisting another Conductor on a train towards the City on a Saturday night. 4 youths board and go straight into the same toilet. The other Conductor gives up in despair.
5a) Do you:-
5a1) Stand there like a lemon saying "Come out and pay"?
5a2) Hide where you can't be seen and wait for them to leave when
they think it's safe so you can jump them?
5a3) Lock them in, phone the police, unlock the door as you arrive at the
station where the police meet you and say "Well, well, well: four
consenting males in a public convenience. These police officers would like a few
words...!"?
5a4) Lock them in, wait until the train departs the City on the next
journey and shout to the Conductor "Oh, Christ: I locked them kids in that
toilet, you know!" so they end up back at their origin point?
5a5) Lock them in and label the toilet out of order then wait to see how
long it takes someone to release them?
5b) Explain the pros and cons of these options.
Q6: You are working a heavily loaded peak hour train. You are aware that many of the 'passengers' are in fact railway staff going home on free passes of one sort or another.
6a) Do you:-
6a1) Take no notice and hide in the back cab until the end of the journey?
6a2) Make one announcement requesting staff to give up their seats?
6a3) Make said announcement, but ordering rather than requesting?
6a4) Announce, then follow up with a ticket check evicting staff politely?
6a5) Make multiple announcements then do a ticket check and evict staff
with audible comments like "Do you not think the rules apply to you then?"
6a6) Refuse to take the train as it is overloaded?
6b) Explain your reasoning.
Q7: You are working an interurban commuter train from Leicester to Birmingham. A passenger presents you with a ticket issued in advance, showing seat reservations, for a journey Leicester to Leeds. The ticket is routed "Sheffield". The passenger has been reserved seats to travel Leicester - Nuneaton - Tamworth - Leeds.
7a) Do you:-
7a1) Do nothing?
7a2) Excess her for being off route?
7a3) Withdraw the ticket, issue her a replacement at no charge and
put the original in for action as an issuing error?
7a4) Tell her the ticket is no good at all, make her pay again and tell her
to return the ticket for a refund?
That'll do for starters; I'll see if I can think up any more. :-)
RossRail - We don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.